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We can be heroes, just for one day




Friday, January 25, 2008
thank God, he has really blessed us all so richly, so unexpected, but it just goes to show, that God is indeed so generous and lovely.

thank you everyone for all ur words of encouragement, concern and prayers!

(:

i didn't do this, God did it, and it really glorified him. i'm so happy, cos rachel was speaking to my mom, and rachel said 'it's really God's grace' and my mom said 'yes, thank God.' HAHA! breakthrough man.

yay, awesome awesome God, really really thank God.
now i'm just praying about where i should go, please pray for me too! thanks y'all! love you all (:
blogged at12:14 AM


Monday, January 21, 2008



i want to be strong for you, Jesus.
i want to lift your name up high.
i lean on you for strength,
and i rest in your comfort.
because you provide, you provide.
i will not sow in the flesh,
but feed my spirit with your word.
i will stand up for you,
reach out for you.
i am a bearer of the cross.
there's swim pe on friday.
man, i so do not want to be in a swimming costume!
why must acjc be rich enough to have a pool?
o level results out on thursday.
i actually kinda like my class now.
i was determined not to stay after the results are out,
but now i don't really know \:
first day of school with my new class, and it's really quite fun, the girls are really nice, and the guys seem fun too. my form teacher's really nice too. pe was a killer though.
oh yeah, there's fun-o-rama this year. BUY TICKETS FROM ME PLEASE!
ayeeeee. swim pe on friday ):
blogged at7:39 PM


Sunday, January 20, 2008
here's how antisocial fairsians bum around in acjc waiting for time to pass.
can you see two more fairsians approaching in the background? hah. this is a picture with beloved aiwee btw (:


nicol at the left hand side of the background of the picture. (yes, nicol is a boy)

we experiment with joy's camera. red skirts!





rophi taught us how to play the flute (:
joy can't blow the flute hahhhhhh.





















blogged at9:39 PM


it's like a peat bog, or like quick sand, if you like. the longer you stand in it, the more you sink, deeper.

i know what many must be thinking, but i am alright.

school is ruining everything though.
my time, my schedule, my life, my friendships (one or two?), my relationship with God, my thinking, my thoughts, my feelings, my moods.

or maybe it's just me?

:(

thanks for all the tags, smses and stuff guys, it's not my practice to reply tags, but i read them, thank you, and i know i haven't been going for church stuff and all lately, i miss you all. i am sorry :(


i miss you aiwee :(

i miss youth services :(

i miss warm, friendly, God-loving fairfield. :(

i miss the people in culture :(

I open my life to You
Lord I want to be pure
Jesus You're breath to my soul
You know what I think what I feel
Jesus I adore You

To You my Savior I will sing
You know me through and through
You're the closest to my heart that
One could be

And Jesus I adore You
I love You with the deepest of my soul
I rest inside Your arms
And I trust You to lead me on


what an awful lot of unsmileys.

nadia, i think i have canoeing on tuesday :( :( :(
see, i told you school's screwing my life up.
blogged at4:58 PM


Monday, January 14, 2008
ohmygosh! i'm starting to blog everyday again. ahahaha. today was a good day (: i had a good time with a couple of girls in my OG. i used to be really anti-social, only hanging out with my OG if i HAVE to. mostly all the anti-social fairsians, ( usually comprising of caleb, rophi, joy sim, nicol, ganesh and i, (sometimes aiwee and janice and rachel and ian join us) ) huddle together at the bleachers, mopping about, waiting for time to pass till our next lecture. but today! ho ho, today was a different day. the day started wonderfully with chapel, yay chapel. felt so so good to be able to lift my hands and worship, proclaiming God's goodness (: helsa is a really awesome worship leader, such a beautiful voice.

anw, two good things happened today in school. during chapel, after worship, this girl from my OG who sat next to me asked me if i was a christian, and we found out that we both were! yay, awesome. then while i was mopping about at the bleachers waiting for maths lecture to start with two girls from my OG, i found out that one of the girls is also a christian, from this church called Church Of God Singapore. heard of it before? apparetly the girl was quite afraid to tell me about her church, cos she says it's different from conventional churches, like there's no pastors, only what they call 'elders' and they call each other brothers and sisters, and they dont have sermons, only brother meetings or something. she says they don't belong to any denomination. i'm not very sure, but i think it's quite cool (: it doesn't matter, because all in all we're serving the same Almighty God! (:

hah, and inbetween lecutres i met up with CHYIWEIIIIIIIII (: she sat with the og girls and i at the bleachers for awhile, before she had to chase her og group cos they left without her ahahah. she's so cute <3!>

oh, and this guy from my og is coming for youth service! like next sat, cos we have ignite this sat and i stupidly forgot. so i shall ask him again. he's indonesian, and i think he's the kind that feels he doesn't really need God. hmm, so i hope the service will be meaningful for him!

went to NUH with aiwee to accompany rachel to get her booster shot for hep A. hahah, but her big mouth got her into trouble and she couldn't take the jab today, cos she had a 'slight fever' ahahah. the nurse even chided her and was all like 'aiyo, j1 alr still behave like a sec1 girl!' hahahah. yes, this is how childish sweet rachel really is. \:

anw, rachel was so convinced she had diabetes, she said she couldn't sleep the whole of yesterday night. apparently her symptoms were 'i drink alot of water and i pee alot and i feel a little increase in fatigue'. -.-

so, nice us followed her to the pharmacy at the hospital and this really nice pharmicist offered to give her a free test! so nice right? it usually costs about 100 bucks for the whole machine thing.

well naturally rachel didn't have diabetes, she was just being her usual bimbo paranoid self. and she was all 'you'll all be sorry when it turns out i really do have diabetes' because nobody believed her when she thought she had diabetes hahaha.

so cool, i think i might wanna be a pharmacist. like go to a poly, take up nursing or something. but the nursing cut off point is like so high, and they say all the people who cannot make it anywhere else end up there. so i dunnnnno. nevermind, shall leave it to God.

guess what! the o level results are coming out soon! the rumours are this friday, next monday or next friday. robin choo asked us to check out this link from cambridge, and they said the results will be released on 21st, next monday, but others say that the 21st is when they will be sending the results to us by plane, so we'll msot likely get it on friday.. ooooooooh, i dunno!

but but but dlskfdslmfdsfmdls;fkldskglsdfdsmfsdlfkkkkkkk! so scary and excited and nervous, hahahah.
okay such a long random useless post, see you people <3!
blogged at8:13 PM


Sunday, January 13, 2008









A, C, J-C.
A C A C J-C.
north, south, east-west.
north south east west who's the best?
AC AC is the best!
not really.
blogged at9:34 PM


i just got back from the scariest car ride ever. i realize now that driving is not as easy as it seems. it's more of like, a game of mind-reading, anticipation, focus, accuracy, control, and you have to like be on your toes 24/7. the atmosphere was tensed, and i had my eyes peeled on the road, the driver, and the cars around us. my ears would have been rotating like a satalite dish if it could.

yeah, my sis just got her driving license, ahahah.
super scary, plus we suddenly got caught in the middle of a thunderstorm, and there was lightning flashing, the works. the vision was like, there was no vision at all, hah!

didn't go for sunday service today. (was about to type church, but i remember that we aren't suppose to use that term in that manner, hah)

i'm gunna join CF, and canoeing with rophi, i think.

you know, i think i really need to manage my time better.

i will miss you so much when you're gone, my dear dear friend. i love you so much. and i will always remember you, and the times we've spent together. i will pray for you always, and i wish you all the best. i know somehow over the months we've not been as close as we've used to be, and i know it's mostly my fault, like i started to go for youth services regularly and like, church events, and so i started to make new friends, and maybe i've spent less time with you all, and maybe you, and the others felt like i didn't care so much about you guys anymore, but i do, just as much, and even more. even though i don't say it, or i don't show it, i hope deep inside you'll know it. i will miss you so much when you're gone. you're amusing antics, the way you call me 'LINE!' the way you always come to me sulking and pouting when someone (like caleb or rophi) teases you, our long chats on msn, the day rachel grace you and i went to cut our fringes, the day like six of us went to cut our hair really short at kimage (or ki-ma-jay if rachel likes to call it hahah) and the really special card you made for me on my 15th birthday, the one with the big brad pitt picture pasted on it, hahah. the times we spent during recess, our little expeditions to the toilet, even starting the we-have-no-money fund with grace, asking people to donate to our fund so that we can use whatever cents that we had to buy fruits to eat during recess, our Lionel Charlie Association.. oh, my dear dear dear friend. there's nothing i can say, that will express how much i will miss you, how much you mean to me, how much i love you. i hope you will continue to grow in the Lord, and we will always be there for you. and in your darkest moments, trust and lean on him, because he will always make a way for you. i'm so sorry, if i have hurt you in the past, i know i have. i hope that you'll only take with you the wonderful memories spent together, not the horrible ones. and i hope that i have been good enough, nice enough, caring enough, loving enough, deserving enough to have earned the right to be your friend. i'm so sorry that i might not be able to send you off, because i might still be at the ignite conference on friday night. but i will try my best, and even if you don't see me, i really wish you all the best, and just know that though i'm not there, i am thinking of you then. you've been an amazing, wonderful friend, my dear aiwee.

Love, FL.
blogged at7:11 PM


Thursday, January 03, 2008
ok, jun hao thinks im blogging this post because of him, but noooo, too bad, it's not, hahah.

not a good start to a new year, i must say. new school, pretty scary, but it's alright i guess. at least there's a herd of fairsians to huddle with whenever necessary. were split into ogs, and low and behold, i was the only fairsian in my og, as usual. this kinda thing always happens to me :/ just like obs. geesh. but it's alright, i thought the people in my grp were a little weird on the first day, but today was much much better, i kinda like my og now.
still trying to soak in the ac culture, i'm a little scared. an ex-fairsian in j2 (joshua) was like ' you guys can use the table nearest to the carpark in the void deck, cuz we j2s don't really use it, it's the fairsian table'. they made it sound like it was this privilege and stuff. anw we were warned not to anyhow sit at any tables in the canteen/void deck, because the tables belong to different cliques. that's kinda scary, isn't it? i mean, they don't officially belong to anybody, but everybody knows.

orientation's quite fun so far, i guess. but fairfield's still home to me. at least they still do devotions during assembly, so that's something. thank God most of my friends are in ac. chyi wei's in ac too, so yay.

it's harder now, like we're all strangers, they don't know me, i don't know them anymore. different values, different opinions on what's important in life. it's so hard to tell them the truth sometimes, my real opinions and reasons for things i do, because they wouldn't understand. it's so funny, how people could live together for nearly all their life, and yet know so little about each other. and i'm so sorry if i'm the one who has to break this family, but if they're asking me to choose sides, i don't know what i'd do. actually, i do. and they wouldn't like it. it's so tempting, to give up, choose the easy way out.

i can't believe what happened, happened. it was like this surge of emotions surpressed underneath, suddenly burst and released..

i tore his singlet.
i wonder why eyes get puffy.
it was like i was watching myself from a distance, doing and saying everything i know i shouldn't have.

please pray for my family.

i don't think i can pretend any longer.
blogged at10:28 PM